I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
