it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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