all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
