we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Randomize
