do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
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