apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Randomize