dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Randomize
