you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize
