He disabled his match.com account in front of me
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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