Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
