I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
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