Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
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