it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
