i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Randomize
