I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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