I have demons in me.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize
