youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
Randomize
