I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
Randomize