It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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