After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize
