Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize
