We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Randomize
