he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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