butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
i would punch a child for taco bell
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
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