Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
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