dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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