how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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