Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
