it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Randomize
