Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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