this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
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