Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Randomize
