i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
In America we eat man semen.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
