why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Randomize