I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
