I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Randomize