Can i not drive my cunt home
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize
