its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Randomize
