Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Randomize
