I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Randomize
