she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
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