Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Randomize
