I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
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