Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Randomize
