remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
