I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Randomize
