Whod you bang
Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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