genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
