Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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