OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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